This is a very bumpy journey for me and today I hit a huge roadblock. Been building up with feeling under the weather, but today I just couldn't get through the exercises. Did the skipping with great difficulty and decided to listen to my body and skipped straight through to the ab work. That nearly cost me my sanity.
I am ashamed of myself, I feel like I am weak and incapable. I am disappointed in myself. And also frustrated.
Holiday eating out not working for me. Having trouble gauging volumes and think I may be erring somewhere. So the decision I have made is that the scales will just have to go with me and also if I have to I will take my own food.
Sunday, 31 July 2011
Saturday, 30 July 2011
Day 61: No action
Not feeling well at all. Felt dreadful yesterday, but woke up feeling worse. Had breakfast out and since they didn't have veg decided I would have my fruit and then veg later. Feel so sick I can't face veg now so will try and settle stomach and feeling of malaise with a high veg content lunch. Exercise will have to wait until late afternoon when it is less sunny (quite cool today) and also to see if there is any improvement.
I know what I need to do, but I can't do it.
I know what I need to do, but I can't do it.
Day 60: Jelly legs & arms, nausea, near vomit, tears
Day 60 and two thirds of the way through, today was the first day that truly nearly defeated me. Squats were OK, but then after the pistol squats and creep my legs became pure jelly. By the time I got through the shoulder exercises the arms were jelly. Midway through came the nausea and then the desire to throw up. Nearly gave in but decided to listen to that voice which is Patrick sitting on my shoulder and kept on going (with great difficulty). Interesting that someone whom I have never met can have a strong influence on me and can sit there on my shoulder or hover in midair, all by virtue of sending me a daily e-mail. By comparison the ab work was easy.
Remain exhausted, but proud of myself that I have made it to Day 60. Am determined to power through not only the next 30 days, but hope that this is an indication of what I will continue to be doing even after I have finished the 90 days.
It is a time of facing myself, pushing myself and also of discovering myself.
Remain exhausted, but proud of myself that I have made it to Day 60. Am determined to power through not only the next 30 days, but hope that this is an indication of what I will continue to be doing even after I have finished the 90 days.
It is a time of facing myself, pushing myself and also of discovering myself.
Thursday, 28 July 2011
Day 59: Exhausted
Everywhere in my body hurts. I am exhausted. Didn't think the exercises had stepped up that much, but am dragging myself through the day.
Skipping today sucked. Leaden lags. Exhaustion cut number of jumps by 20%. Man oh man oh man is it frustrating to not even be able to do 10 jumps consecutively. And that was good. I stumbled on average every 2 jumps. But I did feel proud of myself that whilst it was all a pile of doodoo I kept on going. Not jumping also makes you sweat.
I would like to think that it was nothing to do with my giving in to temptation and having a millefeuile yesterday. Believe it or not I do not have a sweet tooth, but above chocolate mousse I love millefeuile and you can't get them in Japan the way I love... only Holland (and now Bali!). So for the first time in 3 years of seeing one, I lost all discretion.
This afternoon is another afternoon of exercises. Tomorrow is another day of skipping. Since it is Saturday I think I will dispense with first thing in the morning tomorrow to see if a) that is any better, b) I think I need a break from getting up before everyone else.
Skipping today sucked. Leaden lags. Exhaustion cut number of jumps by 20%. Man oh man oh man is it frustrating to not even be able to do 10 jumps consecutively. And that was good. I stumbled on average every 2 jumps. But I did feel proud of myself that whilst it was all a pile of doodoo I kept on going. Not jumping also makes you sweat.
I would like to think that it was nothing to do with my giving in to temptation and having a millefeuile yesterday. Believe it or not I do not have a sweet tooth, but above chocolate mousse I love millefeuile and you can't get them in Japan the way I love... only Holland (and now Bali!). So for the first time in 3 years of seeing one, I lost all discretion.
This afternoon is another afternoon of exercises. Tomorrow is another day of skipping. Since it is Saturday I think I will dispense with first thing in the morning tomorrow to see if a) that is any better, b) I think I need a break from getting up before everyone else.
Day 58: It is what it is
Still on the skipping band wagon. Have been playing around with best way to skip for me. Am ultra impressed by all the rotations everyone is doing and feeling lacking. But I tried this morning to do an imitation of Rocky. And stumbled at every single jump. For a lot of jumps. So I went back to what I find works for me. OK, so I only managed 62-63 skips a minute. But I grit my teeth and I keep going. Also if I managed to do 1,000, then I hop 2,000 due to my weird manner of hopping twice for each loop. Tried to do it once and fell over. Plus, if I stop I lose my groove. I can keep on going, pretty hard (for me), as long as I don't stop. Had a drink after 11 minutes which was a mistake. But I reckon that it is what it is, and it is the best I can do.
Am liking the changes to my body. My new cotton trousers from Scotland fell off me today. Bit embarrassing as I was walking down the rod at the time. Think I might be down a size since then. Will update photos in the next few days.
Not liking the extra sets. Think my teeth may have cracked in the process. My arms fell off last night.
Maybe if I paint a sixpack onto my stomach that will inspire me.
Am liking the changes to my body. My new cotton trousers from Scotland fell off me today. Bit embarrassing as I was walking down the rod at the time. Think I might be down a size since then. Will update photos in the next few days.
Not liking the extra sets. Think my teeth may have cracked in the process. My arms fell off last night.
Maybe if I paint a sixpack onto my stomach that will inspire me.
Wednesday, 27 July 2011
Day 57: Skipping was GREAT today
OK, not without any hiccups but much, much better than up to now and the very first time that I have actually enjoyed skipping. Straight through for 16 minutes... on a daily loop of:
Reach Out (Take That)
Hot & Cold (Katy Perry)
I Kissed a Girl (Katy Perry)
I Got a Feeling (Blackeyed Peas)
and then a bit of Walking on Sunshine (Katrina and the Waves)
Not yet done my exercises but will do them after dinner.
Bit technically challenged here so not been able to post any comments on other blogs. May have to move my laptop around the garden to get a better connection. Plan for tomorrow as another with that as my challenge.
Reach Out (Take That)
Hot & Cold (Katy Perry)
I Kissed a Girl (Katy Perry)
I Got a Feeling (Blackeyed Peas)
and then a bit of Walking on Sunshine (Katrina and the Waves)
Not yet done my exercises but will do them after dinner.
Bit technically challenged here so not been able to post any comments on other blogs. May have to move my laptop around the garden to get a better connection. Plan for tomorrow as another with that as my challenge.
Tuesday, 26 July 2011
Day 56: Paradise
Arrived in Paradise last night and woke up in the wee hours of the morning to the most torrential rain. Thought to myself, this is Bali, it will stop soon. At 8am got soaked when I had to run to the breakfast pavilion, but manna from heaven at 9.30am despite our conviction that it was never going to stop the sky lightened up and there was some indication the sun would actually be seen today. Kids went off to horse camp, and my friend and I did a huge shop at the local supermarket for water, veggies and fruit. And coffee. Beer for the boys. Some treats for the kids. And an electric zapper tennis racket to fry the mozzies (apologies to any mozzie lovers).
I was over the moon yesterday when I realised that if worst came to the worst I could have gado gado and chicken satay at every meal that I eat out if I can't find anything else on the menu. In fact, I may take advantage of that bonus and not bother to cook for myself other than the veggies for breakfast.... not a lot of veggies on the menu other than fried tomato and mushrooms to go with the sausage and diced potato which I will not be having.
Had a millisecond of a waver last night when my friend asked was I really not drinking at all, but my last foray into alcohol land was really not good, so desisted and happily will continue to sip my water. I tried a Perrier with lime the other day and didn't really like it strangely. Part of a metabolic type testing diet that I have been on since the start of this year means that I can't have any citrus. Perhaps there is a reason that I didn't like the lime because my body doesn't like it. Maybe I am imagining things, but I feel dreadful when I have things on the list that I am not supposed to have (they are all PCP compliant and therefore have been adding in a few things for variety), so in many weird and wonderful ways am (finally) beginning to listen to my body. One of the things my body does not seem to like though is flying. Felt ill again on this flight (only 7 hours) which is weird as I felt sick both to and from Scotland.
I was very, very, very happy to discover it was Tuesday and I didn't have to do any exercises, just skip. Am still very tired from yesterday's workout. Both legs and arms. Ready to go tomorrow (I think) after discovering that the improvement in the view (lovely Balinese garden view) whilst I skip and the tunes on my iPod are great to groove to. Finally realised why I don't do as many skips as some of you.. I seem to hop about a lot between skips, ie hop twice for each rotation, a bit a la 1980's aerobics. But I work up a good sweat, am working hard and am tired at the end so figure that a high stepping kick with a flick of the heel may not be so bad after all as I cannot just hop up and down on 2 feet.
I was over the moon yesterday when I realised that if worst came to the worst I could have gado gado and chicken satay at every meal that I eat out if I can't find anything else on the menu. In fact, I may take advantage of that bonus and not bother to cook for myself other than the veggies for breakfast.... not a lot of veggies on the menu other than fried tomato and mushrooms to go with the sausage and diced potato which I will not be having.
Had a millisecond of a waver last night when my friend asked was I really not drinking at all, but my last foray into alcohol land was really not good, so desisted and happily will continue to sip my water. I tried a Perrier with lime the other day and didn't really like it strangely. Part of a metabolic type testing diet that I have been on since the start of this year means that I can't have any citrus. Perhaps there is a reason that I didn't like the lime because my body doesn't like it. Maybe I am imagining things, but I feel dreadful when I have things on the list that I am not supposed to have (they are all PCP compliant and therefore have been adding in a few things for variety), so in many weird and wonderful ways am (finally) beginning to listen to my body. One of the things my body does not seem to like though is flying. Felt ill again on this flight (only 7 hours) which is weird as I felt sick both to and from Scotland.
I was very, very, very happy to discover it was Tuesday and I didn't have to do any exercises, just skip. Am still very tired from yesterday's workout. Both legs and arms. Ready to go tomorrow (I think) after discovering that the improvement in the view (lovely Balinese garden view) whilst I skip and the tunes on my iPod are great to groove to. Finally realised why I don't do as many skips as some of you.. I seem to hop about a lot between skips, ie hop twice for each rotation, a bit a la 1980's aerobics. But I work up a good sweat, am working hard and am tired at the end so figure that a high stepping kick with a flick of the heel may not be so bad after all as I cannot just hop up and down on 2 feet.
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